You Cunt!

I was doing a bit of editing for The Grebe today – Andy Smith’s finders article on the Common Rosefinch incidentally. I’d had the TV on with one eye on Match of the Day and later the Andrew Marr show. I was about to press the red button to watch last nights football league highlights as The Big Questions had come on. For those not in the know The Big Questions is a religious ‘discussion’ programme hosted by rent-a-smug-cunt Nicky Campbell. As I reached for the red button he introduced an item coming up on the show. This item featured a Jedi Knight who was arguing that him not being allowed to wear his Jedi hood was some kind of religious persecution. The crux of his argument is that Muslim women are allowed to wear the burqa so he should be able to wear his Jedi get up..

His feelings that all religions should have equal status. I agree, all religions should get equal status. I’m not religious and I hate religion, it generally seems to be a good idea hijacked by fucking nutters. The problem I have with this young Jedi master is that the Jedi are a figment of George Lucas’s imagination. Jedi is not a religion. At best he’s wearing fancy dress and being ‘a bit whacky.’ In reality he’s a cunt of the highest order, as are all these so called Jedi and anyone speaking fucking Klingon… get a fucking life you sad losers.

If any fucking Jedi wishes to come on and challenge this don’t fucking bother. Try and sort it out by using your Jedi Mind Tricks you fucking wasters!


14 responses to “You Cunt!

  1. David Gray

    John, I would agree with your comments but I think Jedi is a religion as 10,000 sad bast***s put it on there last UK census form and if you get 10,000+ saying that it becomes a fu*kin** religion!!!

  2. thedrunkbirder

    Then they should lose the right to vote and be shipped off on the next (last) space shuttle out of Cape Canaveral.

  3. Who’s the cunt here? The sad mentally retarded fuckwit who wants to believe in The Force, or the fucker giving him airtime to let his fantasy become more real by the second. I fucking hate these ‘healthy debate’ forum type programmes – they are all completely contrived loads of shite.

  4. thedrunkbirder

    They’re all cunts!

  5. All religions are a figment of someones imagination…so why not George Lucas’s?..[answers on a postcard please]….

    Of course…itz all garbage as we know…but the idea’s behind ‘some’ religions are sound enuff…well…sort of ‘sound’! But you are right…nutters always hi-jack the ‘basic’ principles…perverting everything on the alter of self-interest…power/money etc…..the usual bollox….

    ps….anyway..must dash now…juz gonna polish up me light-sabre….

    pps..Darth sends his regards by the way…[tho he was a bit upset that you thought he was dead]…..

  6. All because this “Jedi” was refused entry to Tescos?

    C’mon John you work with folks who have a little bit of an eccentricity, so should spare him the whip.
    This guy should still be allowed to shop wearing his Jedi Hoodie if the Burka wearers are allowed!

    And of Religion……
    Darwin and Wallace killed it off, but still we have millions of daft bastards in the world that need “faith”
    Thank God I’m an athiest!


  7. I can’t find a postcard at the moment, but you’ve hit the nail on the head, Colin – believing in ‘the force’ is no more or less mentally retarded than believing in some made up ‘god’. So in that sense being a fucking Jedi knight or whatever is just as valid or not valid as being a fucking Christian or… no I’d better not mention the other ‘big one’ in case they come after me. Cunts, the lot of em.

  8. thedrunkbirder

    Welcome aboard Oscar. Personally I’m with Andy but I won’t let anything get in the way of a good rant… rational or irrational.

  9. John, I am surprised you haven’t mentioned the Sikhs not having to wear bike helmets debate which was so excellently covered in the latest edition of Viz.( why don’t THEY do an article on viz migging ??)

  10. What intrigues me more about ‘all’ religions…other than the fanatical ‘barkers’ which are just a, sometimes amusing, side-show…is the origins of many belief systems. Humans are ‘hot-wired’ to do so at a fundamental level it seems to me…even those such as ourselves whose logic over-rides many foolish notions/conditioning.
    Put an atheist in ‘extreme’ conditions tho and many will start praying…to what i do not know…[but i’m guessing it ain’t a white bearded bloke sitting on a cloud].
    There was an interesting article in ‘new scientist’ magazine a while back…called ‘De-fault to God’?…which suggests that our brains are ‘programmed’ to invent…what are called…’gods’. I believe this may be true….

    ps…i also believe that science and logic does not have all the ‘answers’…

    pps….any ‘such’ discussions are best carried out under rigorous conditions….preferably late at night down the pub over a few pints…..!

    ppps….the ‘porn fairy’ does exist by the way……[chuckle]….

  11. I see that Lord ‘Vader’ is currently residing on the shetland isles…[maybe he needs petchora pipit for his year list]……….?

    ps…..irrefutable photographic evidence on marks ‘pies n birds’ blog….[itz defo ‘darth’ and not a pile o rocks]……

  12. Believing in The Force is patently not a fucking religion. This is due to the fact that there are no vast tracts of land and wealth associated with it; there are no wars being fought over it; there is no official doctrine or scripture, and it has no legal entity. And because there are no chuch leaders molesting choir boys in the name of The Force(ful entry). Unless being a cunt is the defining attribute, in which case it is a religion.
    I really don’t give a fuck who believes in what; I do give a fuck about what my fucking licence fee is being spent on, and these fucking forum shows are a waste of fucking money. Sorry, I appear to have stumbed into a right fucking ramble with lots of fucking.

  13. Re your comments about land, wealth, wars, child molesting etc, Mark – just give it time…

  14. Good ‘fuckin’ rant Mark….[do you feel better now]?!

    Inbetween the ‘fucks’ you highlight the reasons why tis best to avoid organized ‘religion’…..[evil perverts are attracted like flies to shit].
    Of course there are degree’s of ‘nuts’…some people are relatively harmless within religious sects…..[okay..they might be deluded…but most folk are deluded to some degree i reckon]…

    ps…related to the topic of ‘head fucks’ and licence fee’s…….did you catch last episode of bbc’s ‘last chance to see’ with luvvy Stephen Fry? Watching that guy getting ‘head-raped’ by a parrot was rather amusing…dirty bastard birds….kakapo’s…!

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